“It was a dark and stormy night. . .”

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This year’s winner of the Bulwer-Lytton Prize is Molly Ringle for this cubic zirconia of a gem:

For the first month of Ricardo and Felicity’s affair, they greeted one another at every stolen rendezvous with a kiss — a lengthy, ravenous kiss, Ricardo lapping and sucking at Felicity’s mouth as if she were a giant cage-mounted water bottle and he were the world’s thirstiest gerbil.

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